When you are divorced with kids, dating can be even more difficult. This is why a lot of divorced parents decide to stay single β they may have little time to date, or they may want to spend their free time with their kids, or they may be afraid their children especially teenagers will never accept a new romantic relationship. In fact, if you want a new companion, it can actually benefit you, your children, and your family life if you find the right person.
If your children are under the age of five, introducing them to a new partner may not be that difficult, especially if you were their primary caregiver and the other parent was gone working a lot. But the older children get, and the more attached they are to your former spouse, the more you need to ease them into it.
Understandably, children of divorce usually need time before they can accept someone new. The first thing you want to do is not introduce your child to someone new while your divorce is pending or immediately after the divorce is final. Instead, only date when your child is with the other parent. Expect it to take time for your children to accept a new partner. Keep everything slow and gradual, especially as you date.
Ask questions about this person, such as do they have a criminal record? Have they ever been convicted of domestic violence? Do they have a substance abuse problem? Have they been married before? Do they have children too? How do they manage money? Does this person share the same views about money, politics, religion, parenting, and socializing? Do they have a good work ethic? Get to know them, especially before you let them be around your children.
Good sites to look at are LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram. At that point, you can introduce them to your kids and hope the relationship lasts, but there is no guarantee. Unless your spouse is emotionally or physically absent as a parent or abusive, your child is probably attached to him or her.
