I can almost hear the players who find respite in table-top role-playing games TTRPGs , the ones who use the medium as a way of disassociating from reality, crying protests. This is where I escape my boring life! Honestly, same, but consider for a moment that every player, despite their motivation for creating a character, remains a real person IRL, playing a game. This unique, make-believe blending of reality and fantasy, wrapped in suspending disbelief and facilitated by playing with our friends, creates a space where we have the freedom to explore our identities.
Even the characters we make to escape reality reveal something about our real-world needs. For example, I once made a half-orc fighter, which at the time I thought was so antithetical to my typical play style. I tend to play charismatic magic users, but wanted to challenge myself as a player, so I made Ursula. Ursula was crude and loud and thirsty in all the ways ; she was unapologetic about both her skill as a fighter and her tall, powerful body.
Keeping in mind that I purposefully made this character to avoid playing someone too similar to myself, I now laugh. In a lot of ways, Ursula reveals more of me than any of my other PCs because she reflects the parts of myself with which I struggle. At the same time, playing a half-orc allowed me to practice acceptance and rehearse confidence in game. You can guess how these skills replicated in my own life afterwards. In my work as a counsellor, we might see the similarities between this exploration of identity and an internal family systems IFS approach to therapeutic play.
Briefly, IFS is a therapeutic approach developed by Dr. Richard C. A few years ago, I had the opportunity to hear Canadian counsellor, scientist and storyteller, Deborah MacNamara, speak on therapeutic play. I remember three specific points she shared during her lecture. Second, that our brains take a break and suspend reality as we engage in Play hello escapism, my friend.
And third, that because of this suspended reality, our brains are allowed to feel safe while we Play. Safe to admit your jean size and embrace your height. Safe to reveal your failed violin ambitions. Safe enough, even, to question your sexuality. Given the safety created by the act of playing, TTRPGs function as a systemic framework in which players have the unique opportunity to address parts of themselves. As the characters in my novel learn, Who We Are in Real Life might just begin with who we are in game.
