The Nerd: You know, for 15 years, I've been warning you not to play shitty games, and all this time, I've been so focused on taking you back to the past, I kinda forgot about the present. So, let's play something recent for a change. Yeah, let's go all the way. Let's try out Life of Black Tiger.
It was originally a mobile game for the iPhone and Android, eventually ported to the PS4 in They say it's bad, but this is a current generation console. I think by now, game developers would learn from their mistakes, so It starts off with a weird stock acoustic guitar loop. The Nerd: Sounds like the intro to a massage therapist's website The Nerd: All of a sudden, it switches to this heavy metal riff!
Then you get the storyline for this emo black tiger. His parents left him, he's all alone, so he hates everything. It's quite a serious and sad plot to start a game with. What happened to the frame rate? It's giving me a headache! These characters look so ass. Is that Belle from Beauty and the Beast? They smell bad.
This is for real? The game itself plays worse than you can imagine. Controlling the camera is reversed, meaning it's the complete opposite of how you control any other modern game.
The controls are a baffling mess, and the tiger moves slower than shit advancing through a sloth's anus. I'm holding the run button, too! Without it, you can barely even crawl.
